wiggolation

Road Trippin'

Back in the day it might have been the case that I'd be rolllin' some j's and gettin' the bus stocked up with party favours. But today I think it's all about coffee and water and some high energy snacks. If I only had a radar detector. Anyway, I'm pushing off soon, just as soon as the big wave of rush hour traffic dies down. I should be on the road by 9:15 P.M. and in Chicago by the same time in the A.M.

If all goes well this could be the beginning of a series of road trips.

Happy turkey, or whatever you eat this time of year, to all in cyberville.

Hee haw

The work drama seems to have died down a little, thank god. I got a call from the big boss on Sunday night; she said she had talked to the little boss and that the little boss probably did not do everthing she could to "encourage clear communication and relations" between us, or something like that. Well, I was glad to get the call. It means, I hope, that this big boss is actually reliable to some extent--she'll talk to people and tell people what she thinks. That's a step in the right direction. I feel I have set up some kind of behavior motivation in my little boss, the annoying one, that is, I hope she realizes that if she tries any of her BS again I'm going right to the boss. I likes them apples.

So all this meant back to focusing on teaching, for better or worse. I can't stand that about half the students are just not working hard. So many just sit there without writing or reading or thinking. I think they expect me to do everything for them. I made that mistake last year. I literally was working myself so that my lessons would end with me spelling everything out. I don't think I put enough in in terms of planning for the hard work they were supposed to do. With ESL it can be tricky sometimes as you don't necessarily have a "content area" like math or history or even English teachers have. Therefore, you have to build in some core skills they have to master. Problem is that in the would-be brilliant minds in Albany there actually is a core content area--namely, English or "language arts"--but this confounds things somewhat as it's hard to get the content across if there is not enough time to spend on language acquisition. Well, it's the same old argument: teach to the Regents test OR teach them what they should be learning, i.e., ESL. But ESL belongs in the domain of English as much as my ass belongs in a bikini.

Otherwise I have always thought about doing a third year in NYC just cos I thought leaving after only two, when my Columbia program ends, would be stupid. That was until all the shit started at school. Now I'm actually thinking about looking for a teaching job elsewhere. Either at another high school in NYC or another type of school in NYC. Or in another city altogether. Naturally, I checked out the Chicago Public Schools website. There I would make the same money but spend a ton less since the cost of living is a lot lower than in NYC, according some of those salary calculators. Well, I'm certainly not making any decisions now, but I am going to think about it over the holiday season. There is always the thought in the back of my mind of doing a doctorate too. But I don't know if I want to do yet another degree just yet. Two in a row has been pretty exhausting when you add in the teaching bizz....

I spent my lunch period mapping out my route to Chicago. It's a fairly straight shot along I-80 all the way to Illinois. That I'm doing it alone at night just adds to the cheesy wanna-be adventure of it all.

If it weren't for the weird images I keep getting of a lunatic smashing into my car while I catch some z's at a rest stop I'd be more excited.

The Meeting

Well, I was waiting for it: the AP called me up for a chat. We couldn't even agree on meeting to chat. She said 'come see me today for a talk' in the morning and I said OK. I went to see her twice and she said she was busy. Well, I said, on the second try, 'just put what you have to say in my box and I'll read it at home this weekend'. Well, she did not like that and got pissed off. So after school she passed on word through someone else to me to see her. I did and she told me to sit and I said I prefer to stand etc. etc. It went pretty badly as she just tried to do exactly what I thought she would, that is, brush everything under the carpet and warn me about going to our principal, that is, over her. I told her, in other words than these, that I in fact I would go over her and that I would say what I had to say and that I think her version of what has not been going right as regards our work relations was different from mine, etc. etc.

Well, she tried once agian to threaten me and make me wuss out of a battle with her, essentially.

I am happy to have her in a pickle. For once she is having to answer to someone above her. She hates it and it is bothering her to no end and she wants to dump on someone. Proving once again she is an idiot. And bitchy. And in the wrong job.

I should have told her that there are great job opportunities in the custodial profession. But saying that would be insulting to our very cool janitor.

November's almost over?

As for me there are just a few days left to teach this month: tomorrow, Monday, Tuesday. Wednesday is a blow-off day as we are teaching a half day and serving Thanksgiving dinner to the kiddies. That rocks. I'll be purchasing something on the way to school that day, as other teachers are tossing in all kinds of home cookin'.

The road trip to Chicago edges on mind. I can't wait. I am really looking forward to being off four days (not including blow-off Wednesday). Even if the trip is plain boring I am ready to get out on the open road in the new ride and be away from the megalopolis and be in just in a ... metropolis.

I was thinking of tinting the windows in the P5 but it's illegal to have tints period. So I'm a little reluctant.

Man, Michael Jackson looks like a super-freak in his mugshot! No news there though...

Meanwhile the music students want to do a radio production project and a music video! This is gonna be fun. I'll have to get the old digital out for this one. This class can be really cool when the troublemakers are absent.

APs and other headaches

I don't normally care to even think about it when I'm not at school let alone write about it on my blog but my AP is really getting on my nerves. I should say, had been getting on my nerves. She's just not very effective and has said a lot of stupid things to many people, teachers and others in our school. She doesn't have any vision and puts out fires instead of planning and leading our school. She is often sitting around chatting and laughing and talking about herself at others when I come into the main office. She seldom breathes a word that is even remotely related to teaching or education or running a school. Well, this is the tip of the proverbial iceberg.

I noticed quite early on that our school worked in a fucked up kind of way, so to speak. Based on my best observational skills and analysis, the teachers in our school have been conditioned or scared or threatened not to stand up for themselves and to fear what might be done to them should they ever speak out against others even though they may be being treated unfairly. In other words, there is a boss up in the office who should not be pissed off or challenged or whatever.

To complicate things there is a certain teacher in the school who is very influential over this AP. So these two work together to run things in the school as they like. Last year, to give you some background, there were three teachers who were particularly vocal against this teacher and AP duo, and they lost their jobs. They were let go. We teachers never learned why they were let go but it was clear to us that there was some high drama and politics behind the scenes that ended up somewhat unhappily for the said three teachers.

Anyway, this AP is really a fruitcake. She has said several stupid things to me personally but more importantly she has tried to mold me into one of The Beaten, i.e., the teachers who have no nerve to speak up for themselves. I, of course, dear reader, cannot sleep knowing someone is scheming thus! So I was delighted to learn this summer that we would be gaining a principal with the new school status we took on this fall. I was finally able to make my move yesterday after a staff meeting at which our new principal was present. Seeing as she is based at our other 'campus' I took the opportunity to strike while I could get her in person.

Well, I was able to get her in private in my room after the meeting. The AP actually happened to see us together and I know she was a bit confused and anxious about what the hell we were doing. My thinking is that the AP believed no one would dare go 'above her' to talk to the principal, but I could not resist. I talked about several issues that existed between me and the AP and the ways in which the AP displayed poor judgment and unprofessional behavior in dealing with me, whether we were dealing with students or other things, none of which I care to describe in detail here.

In my room I let it all out. The principal listened to me and asked some good questions and said she was going to speak to the AP and that we three of us would certainly talk together soon. We thanked each other and we went home.

Today there was no communication between me and the AP, which is interesting. I thought it would be that way, but I thought too that it might be the case that the AP would ask to speak with me. I figured she might try to play me a little and use some bs tactic, as if to say, 'You can talk to ****** but just remember I run this school when she's not around' or something. Well, it did not happen and the reason I believe it didn't has to do with the fact that the AP is herself afraid of the principal, who is said to be 'pretty tough'. Hey, tough I don't mind; it's 'stupid' and 'wrong' I can't stand.

Well, it seems that I have finally done something to affect the situation that has been bothering me for a while. For that I'm very relieved, though I acknowledge things have not improved just yet and may not at all. Still, I'm 'cautiously optimistic'.

I know there are a million teachers out there who have beefs with their co-workers and APs and principals. But I think when you have a serious problem like in our school you have to do something. Not having anyone to go to last year other than the problem herself sucked. Now, at least, there's hope.

It's a shame there is such bs teachers have to put up with. It sucks the energy out of them. It makes them bitter and jaded and pissed off. I think it's one of the many reasons why teachers in big systems like NYC's don't last long. And the stats are there--turnover among NYC high school teachers is super duper high.

If all goes well I will be able to teach again without having to worry about some incompetent, trivial, scheming AP getting in the way.

If my life

is anything like my blog suggests it is, I'm pretty pathetic. I think I need a break from my weekends, let's just get that straight. Otherwise, I am working on a damn assignment that is just sitting there staring at me in the face. In fact, I'm off to the library now to do it. Then meet up with the project partner. I haven't started planning for this week yet, but it's only 10 AM on Sunday. I figure I could get away with just doing grad stuff till this evening.

Watched Ratcatcher. Pretty cool movie. I doth recommend. Though it's like a lot of the movies that come from Scotland--depressing. But there's a certain humour you gotta like. Besides, I like depressing.

'November spawned a monster'

But at least at the end of it you get a party or two. Yes, there's going to be a party in DeKalb two days after Thanksgiving chez Melina Bar. What a cool name she has. It's pathetic, indeed, that this is my shining light at the end of this ugly month-long tunnel. The old gang from NIU days will be there, so that makes it all worthwhile.

Otherwise I made it through two days of 'Ramp Up to Literacy' training. It was OK overall, surprisingly, but not for reasons the department of ed of nyc would probably expect. I mean, I am not a 'Ramp Up' teacher and my school is not making me use the methods and approaches Ramp Up espouses in my classes. Instead, I think I'll be borrowing some of what I learned and incorporate it into my lessons and overall 'best practices'. I still don't think my school has a clue as to what it's doing as regards Ramp Up and a lot of the very people who are supposed to be teaching others how to use it, who were in attendance at this training, also were confused. So it seems most everyone is trying to wrap thier heads round this Ramp Up business.

For the record, the Brooklyn Marriott is pretty posh, and the breakfast and lunch they gave us were top-notch. I was surprised the DOE put us up there. I'd envisioned trailors in an unincorporated area of Brooklyn. TV dinners.

Meanwhile there is a 'language experience' reading project I've got to complete this week. I have to tell some kid a story and ask them to retell it to me and record the whole thing. Then transcribe it. Then go back and bother the kid and ask them to edit it. Then edit it again. I'm not really looking forward to it for what I'd guess are obvious reasons. It's kinda boring. But it may be interesting to do.

We get our midterms back from Assessment tomorrow, I hope. That should be scary enough. The prof said everyone does badly on it. Well, that's great, thanks. But later, in the final version in December, most do fine. My question is, what happened to 'everyone' doing fine in the end. Lord help those who can't help themselves.

At this rate, November will be over before you know it. And December always seems a blur.

That's a good thing.

Cold is come, is come

First really cold weekend of the fall is here and it's cold as hell, as the saying goes. I was supposed to play football today but it didn't happen as the person organizing didn't show up (!!). Well, I managed to jog a little and be outside among the colorful trees along the Hudson at Riverside Park. Although my jog lasted a minute and half, it was revitalizing.

I need to join a gym. I went from cycling 60 miles no sweat to almost certain death upon climbing my stairs to my apartment. This is probably not a good sign.

I blame it on the 'sedentary' lifestyle I have chosen. That makes it all better. Whew, that's easy!

I think there's a nice old pool nearby I can join pretty cheap. I just hate the idea of the local pervert checking me out in my swim gear. Ew!

As for more serious matters I went to IKEA and bought some speaker stands. The home cinema is coming along nicely. Now I just need a popcorn maker. And some DVDs!

I have to attend more professional development tomorrow and Tuesday, a day which most teachers have off. The pluses are that I get paid per session on Tuesday and have a two-day break from the teaching thing. I don't mean to be so superficial, but the 'pro devil' is so crappy in this system. No one cares who you are. They tell you stuff you already know. They think they are experts, when in point of fact you know the methode du jour better than they. The list goes on. Besides, I have too many problems with these people telling us methods that don't allow for teachers' input and students' input. I could go on.

But I will just say that the bottom line, all you teachers, is to do what you know works best. Keep learning: That's good. Just be wary of others cramming any method down your throat. Fuck that.

Besides, we didn't pay 75,000 on our degrees to end up teaching that which any virgin undergrad could do in their sleep. No offense to undergrads: Sure I was one myself;)

Life

continues, more or less. I'm up late writing my midterm project which is due tomorrow. I forgot how much I don't like writing lit reviews. Mainly cos it is preventing me from sleeping. God I miss getting eight hours of sleep. Those WERE the days. At least I was able to make up a test for tomorrow to give the kids. So much for the big wigs coming to observe us. 'Sure, have a seat here and watch me sit and do my homework while these fine young students take a test.'

Decided I'm going to road trip to Chicago after all. Figured I really need to get out of NYC for a while. I look forward to being in the old town again. And testing out the new wheels on the open road.

These last two or three weeks have been seriously exhausting. I just can't get ahead. Teaching, the main thing, is going fine and I actually feel I'm getting a really good grip on what I'm doing. Well, most days. I just hate being tired ALL THE TIME and so annoyed at little things cos I'm stressed. The diet and lack of sleep have to change. Soon.

I don't blog anymore either. Well, very little. And I have not read a good book in ages cos ... I just can't right now.

Back to the midterm and second language writing tests....

Nothing

to report. Been working on the midterm for SLA. Problem is I just can't get motivated lately to do much more than sleep and eat and, eh, that's about it. I think it's due to the overkillability of my schedule. But why complain.

My car's factory alarm is still not working right, so when I set it it goes off by itself. Therefore I don't set it and depend wholly on locking the doors and The Club. Problem there is when I hear a car alarm I think it's mine. And I hear an alarm about every ten minutes, no joke.

While I was driving through Manhattan tonight I came across none other than New York Chancellor of Education Joel Klein. It's was kind of weird seeing him as he walked hand-in-hand with his woman, smoking a cigar. I wanted to shout out the window, 'Hey, Klien. Give the teachers a break!' or something obnoxious like that. But right about then he spat into the street and I just couldn't.

Hard to believe November is here. I am excited that that Columbia degree will be just a semester away come Xmas. I'll then be able to just teach. Seems like a dream.

Otherwise I have some BS professional development to attend this Tuesday. Fun. Another inexperienced 'ESL Specialist' telling experienced ESL teachers how to do their job a la NYC methodology du jour.